I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Im part way to drunk.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
