You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
i believe in u and ur pee
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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