escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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