As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
