I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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