remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
