i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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