I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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