I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
