doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i barfeds in our rink
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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