I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
