Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
