we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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