Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
