Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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