Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
