is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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