I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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