I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I take back everything I said about communal showers
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You have to summon your inner elephant
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
