so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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