why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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