super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
