plz talk dirty to me
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
What did we do last night that was yellow?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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