5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
