Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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