Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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