overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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