Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
