Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize