How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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