so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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