In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
