she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize