she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
no you cant smoke seaweed
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize