I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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