the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Farmville is her only friend.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
