Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
