oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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