She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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