More tranny stories later!
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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