I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
