we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
