Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
