Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
