I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
