it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
i think im in europe. pls send help
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