I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
