dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
