Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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