I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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