i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
